A New Journey

I have decided to embark on a new journey.  It won’t be an easy one.  I am hoping that as I chronicle the adventure that I will be able to provide hope for someone with the same struggles and find people that will be encouraging while holding me accountable. This wasn’t an easy decision to make and has been in the works for several years.  I first considered it over 5 years ago and had the support of my husband.  It didn’t feel like the right time then.  With health issues becoming a concern, recognizing the limits that my choices have created, and experiencing the rudeness of people who don’t know me, I decided that now was the right time. 

In July, I attended a meeting at MedCenter One in Bismarck to begin the process of getting a gastric bypass.  I chose MedCenter One because I felt that it would be too difficult to be hospitalized in the same place that my husband had been while he was fighting cancer.  I attended the meeting alone after doing some shopping.  I have crowd anxiety issues so getting this far was a boost of confidence.  I was feeling really good….until.  I sat down to look through the materials.  I glanced up at the screen and saw that the surgeon that performed three surgeries on Dan would also be my surgeon. He had switched hospitals. This rattled me a little, but I pulled myself together and made it through the meeting.  I came home and spent a considerable amount of time filling out paperwork and making the necessary appointments.  I met with and got a referral from my primary physician, met with the psychiatrist for the required evaluation, (I passed, by the way), and planned for my appointment with the surgeon.  Three days before my appointment, I received a call.  I was told that my surgeon was no longer employed by that hospital and the appointment was cancelled.  I decided to look at my options.  MedCenter One was working on getting another surgeon certified, but they didn’t know how long that would take.  I contacted MidDakota Clinic and started the process again.  More paperwork, more medical records to be released.  On October 16^th, I met with the nutritionist, nurse, financial department, and the surgeon.  I originally wanted the surgery to be in November, but everything would have to fall into place quickly.  As of today, my medical records still have not been sent to MidDakota.  In addition, because of some of the limitations following surgery, I would have to be very careful at Christmas.  I decided that I didn’t want to give up being able to play with and hold my grandchildren.  The surgery is tentatively set for February 13^th.  It won’t be set for sure until my medical records are received and insurance authorizes the surgery. 

So the journey begins. The journey to a longer and healthier life.

On Fire

As a culmination to a unit on fruits and vegetables, I assigned the groups to find a recipe for salsa that we would prepare in class.  As part of the instructions, I warned them of the perils of skin to sensitive skin contact after working with hot peppers.  Most of the recipes called for using jalapeno peppers.  A couple of groups asked if I would buy ghost peppers for them.  Ghost peppers are extremely hot.  I told the groups that I would not buy them, but if they wanted to bring them in, they could use them.  Before going into the lab, I again explained that working with peppers can bring pain and encouraged the students to use plastic gloves.  Having five sons, I know a little bit about teenage boys.  One thing that I know is that they don’t always heed advice. Another thing that I know is that they like to push the envelope.  The day after the lab, I had a conversation with one young man’s father.  He told me that on the evening before, his son had used the bathroom.  After returning to where his dad was, he began to experience a burning sensation which caused some squirming.  After a few minutes, his dad asked him what was going on.  He replied that he used the restroom and despite washing his hands several times, the skin to sensitive skin contact was causing some discomfort.  Ok, that’s not really how he said it, but you get the idea.  The next day in class another student relayed a similar story, which culminated in the young man saying, “I felt like my crotch was on fire.”  I reminded him that I had encouraged him to wear gloves, but he thought that he knew better.  The consequences were quite painful.

God has given us clear directions through His Word for how to avoid needless pain.  He knows what will happen if we choose to sin.  He wants to spare us that pain.  Unfortunately, we think we know better and we do things that go against what He has said.  Then the pain starts…..maybe not immediately, but it does start and we start squirming.  Sometimes it takes some reflection to figure out what is causing the pain and sometimes we can pinpoint the cause immediately. Hopefully, we recognize that the best choice is to follow God’s commands and not think that we know better. 

One of the young men wrote on my board, “Mrs. Holm is always right.”  We need to write on our lives, “God is always right”.